5 years after first cases, Manitoba families who lost loved ones to COVID-19 still feel missed moments

Caitlyn Gowriluk · CBC News

· Posted: Mar 09, 2025 7:00 AM EDT | Last Updated: 9 minutes ago

Retired caregiver Valerie Alderson doesn't find herself reasoning backmost to the aboriginal days of the COVID-19 pandemic anymore, but erstwhile idiosyncratic brings it up, "it's a flashback of what has happened."

That includes the decease of her 82-year-old dad, Lloyd Hodgins, who was sent to the infirmary aft breaking his hep successful a autumn and died not agelong aft of COVID-19 complications, successful November 2021, "all alone, without anybody," due to the fact that of pandemic rules astatine the clip restricting infirmary visitors. 

"Both my sister and I were vaccinated. We could person had our masks on, visors on, gown on, gloves connected to beryllium with him," said Alderson, 63.

"I ever deliberation it's important that erstwhile you person a loved 1 spell … for idiosyncratic to beryllium there, whether it's to clasp their hand, to hitch their face, to sing a song, to work poetry, whatever. Because the proceeding is the past happening that goes connected immoderate idiosyncratic that's passing away, and past they're gone."

Justin Dusik's household besides went done that experience.

The 34-year-old said helium ne'er got the accidental to accidental goodbye to his grandparents, who some died successful their 80s wrong little than 2 weeks of each different successful 2021.

When his grandpa died, his 3 sons had to ticker implicit a video telephone arsenic helium took his past breaths, Dusik said.

"To me, it's astir heartless, wherever you don't get the basal quality decency to beryllium successful idiosyncratic to comfortableness that loved 1 during a pugnacious clip successful their beingness oregon to, you know, clasp a hand, accidental your goodbyes," Dusik said.

"But during the pandemic, we didn't get that opportunity. So radical passed distant alone. People passed distant without saying their goodbyes oregon letting their past thoughts beryllium known."

While some person been capable to determination on, they said they inactive successful a mode transportation those times with them astir 5 years aft Manitoba's archetypal presumptive COVID-19 cases were reported successful March 2020.

"In the end, you can't reconcile that. You ne'er get that accidental again with that person," Dusik said. "But determination was thing we could bash astir it astatine the time."

It's a improvement that became reasonably communal during parts of the pandemic — and a argumentation prime 1 advocator says "really broke radical emotionally" and that whitethorn person been approached differently, successful hindsight.

"It's hard to explicate the panic that you person by having 1 of your loved ones taken distant oregon locked up and having perfectly nary thought if they're live oregon dormant oregon if they're successful a captious condition," said Laura Tamblyn Watts, CEO of nationalist seniors' advocacy enactment CanAge.

"We had radical for whom their spouses were hospitalized, and they couldn't truly adjacent get a clasp of them, not adjacent connected the phone, to find retired what was happening to them — and past days later, uncovering retired that they were connected ventilators."

Tamblyn Watts said looking back, "one of the things we learned precise rapidly was however important societal transportation truly was," calling it "as important arsenic truly the aesculapian attraction itself." 

Instead of relying connected "blanket no-visitor policies," she said facilities similar hospitals could person alternatively focused connected reducing hazard by utilizing bully manus washing and idiosyncratic protective instrumentality and ensuring everyone was vaccinated.

'Huge intelligence impact'

Another effect of those policies was felt by health-care workers, who were forced to beryllium gatekeepers of people's entree to their loved ones.

"The level of trauma that they were experiencing was besides thing that we didn't speech capable about," Tamblyn Watts said.

Alderson, who during the pandemic worked arsenic a home-care nurse, said she knows first-hand the "huge intelligence impact" the pandemic had connected everyone, from workers to patients.

During the tallness of visitant restrictions, determination were days erstwhile she whitethorn person been the lone idiosyncratic immoderate of her patients saw, she said.

"They felt isolated," she said. "They couldn't spell to church. They couldn't locomotion down the hallway successful the flat gathering to spell sojourn their friend."

Dusik said portion to the champion of his knowledge, the infirmary unit who dealt with his grandparents "were rather accommodating and did their champion to beryllium compassionate arsenic professionals," helium thinks they "might person been a small hampered by the policies astatine manus oregon dictated by the government."

"I cognize doctors and nurses are quality conscionable similar the remainder of us, truthful if they would person been capable to accommodate those requests, I deliberation astir of them would have," helium said.

While the worst days of the COVID-19 pandemic's effects whitethorn present look acold successful the past, immoderate — similar retired caregiver Alderson — said they interest astir however Manitoba's strained health-care strategy volition code what comes successful the future.

"I fearfulness what's going to hap successful 25 years, erstwhile I whitethorn request it much than what I person now," she said.

She hopes facilities similar semipermanent attraction homes, hospitals and clinics "have learned from their acquisition successful regards to protecting the unit and the patients."

Seniors' advocator Tamblyn Watts said she besides worries astir immoderate of the much caller changes to argumentation astir mitigating the effects of COVID-19, including the Public Health Agency of Canada's announcement that the provinces and territories volition instrumentality implicit purchasing their ain supplies of vaccines.

"This was a defining infinitesimal successful our lives. And if you look astatine the things that we request to larn from, COVID-19 is not thing that we tin crook our heads distant from.… It's inactive around, and truthful is RSV and truthful is pneumonia, and truthful are each kinds of different infectious diseases," Tamblyn Watts said.

"We'll interruption our health-care strategy with different pandemic unless we enactment preventive wellness successful place. And we are doing the precise other close now."